'If I wouldn't feel as much as I do in love with you, I'd hate your guts!''
-I know that.
He expected me to feel surprised. Like I wasn't as much as aware as I am by the effect that I have on men.
I was born being this BITCH. I was always strange in essence yet men always were fascinated by me exactly cause of that. I was cursed to never be vanilla, never have a male friend. Never to see men acting indifferent if found in my presence.
Which of course only increased my sadism. If others girls WANTED to be me, then it meant that being ME meant that I possesed a power that I should use to exploit others.
Becoming a domina/dominant woman and then easily a Findomme/A Mental Sadist and even a Pro-domme for a while was easy, because the core always existed. I was a seductress ever since I can remember.
From male teachers giving me straight A's because they just couldn't look at me without feeling strange, up until my attempts of having boyfriends and ending up having slaves.
It was something there. And it was intense.
That absurd influence. That wicked mind. That thing that makes men curious and hating my guts because they know I'm crazy and that I'll end up hurting them badly.
So I suppose. I'm used to hear words like love/hate from men in the same context.
I've heard them as being a FINDOMME for many, many times.
But I always knew that it was their natural defense as feeling pain.
I also knew that I'd rather have them hate me than love me. Hate is a much stronger emotion.
It can make you sleep bad at night, it can even slowly kill you.
I've been hated for years. And served. And worshipped.
Yet never forgotten. I prefer it that way.
It's like you're in this dark twisted novel.
You've been part of it yet never truly managed to recover and get back into reality.
While I.. well I was happy like always.
-I know that.
He expected me to feel surprised. Like I wasn't as much as aware as I am by the effect that I have on men.
I was born being this BITCH. I was always strange in essence yet men always were fascinated by me exactly cause of that. I was cursed to never be vanilla, never have a male friend. Never to see men acting indifferent if found in my presence.
Which of course only increased my sadism. If others girls WANTED to be me, then it meant that being ME meant that I possesed a power that I should use to exploit others.
Becoming a domina/dominant woman and then easily a Findomme/A Mental Sadist and even a Pro-domme for a while was easy, because the core always existed. I was a seductress ever since I can remember.
From male teachers giving me straight A's because they just couldn't look at me without feeling strange, up until my attempts of having boyfriends and ending up having slaves.
It was something there. And it was intense.
That absurd influence. That wicked mind. That thing that makes men curious and hating my guts because they know I'm crazy and that I'll end up hurting them badly.
So I suppose. I'm used to hear words like love/hate from men in the same context.
I've heard them as being a FINDOMME for many, many times.
But I always knew that it was their natural defense as feeling pain.
I also knew that I'd rather have them hate me than love me. Hate is a much stronger emotion.
It can make you sleep bad at night, it can even slowly kill you.
I've been hated for years. And served. And worshipped.
Yet never forgotten. I prefer it that way.
It's like you're in this dark twisted novel.
You've been part of it yet never truly managed to recover and get back into reality.
While I.. well I was happy like always.